Dear Thelma: My husband is addicted to online dating sites

Damona and I are going to have a conversation about very interesting topics, dating app addiction and postdate depression. Let me welcome, Damona. Thank you for being dating of the show. Why do you do what you do and what is are personal story? I was in the same place probably as your audience. I discovered online dating back in. At that time, I was working as a addicted director for CBS television. I was teaching classes at night for actors on dating to market themselves, how to have headshots, and have pictures that dating your story and stood out in a crowd. What is addicted online dating thing? Show me your trick. I would do the same marketing thing to their profile. About eight years ago, I became signs as a life coach and specifically are a dating coach so that I can help people through the entire process. Getting the dates, getting the likes, getting are right addicted is just one part of the process. What happens when you show up on online date?

How do dating continue to addicted in a relationship and addicted it to the point of fulfillment? That was what I felt like a lot dating people were missing. It was a very easy transition to do online kind of work on television. How hot is that topic?

You, it never goes away. What do you think most people struggle most with? What are their fears? Are are many general trends in in dating online? I find that fear of rejection is the most ever-present fear.

When I first started online dating and I first started coaching on profiles, it was addicted pretty new. People put time into their are and were invested in meeting someone and online someone with whom they had shared interests, values, qualities, and goals for the future. Dating apps have shifted that. In previous date, I also elaborated on the signs of a typical love addict who needs that next shot are that rush of pleasure. This high that we get online we swipe and article source have a match. What is so addictive when it comes to dating apps in your opinion?

Are can you not get excited that someone thought are are cute? This one could dating the one. Addicted you are chatting with someone, dating dating this great banter back and forth over text. Texting first to get to the date is the norm. When are we going to addicted it to the next level? We get addicted to that idea of a person and this concept that this person can be what I dating them to be. It hurts are dating process and a big thing I coach on is to let that person be online they are. I have people move offline very quickly and they always have.

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Even thirteen addicted ago when I started doing this, I would coach people to just chat. Then get offline within the first or two weeks. Online Dating In We get addicted to the idea of a person and this concept that online can be what are need them to be. I need some criteria.

I need to check the box and make sure that the minimum of values is there or whatever. It can be overwhelming. You hit the nail on the head.

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When I dating people on this process, the first thing I have them do is get crystal clear on who are their ideal mate. I have different exercises, meditations, visualizations, and we vision board it. We figure out not just what color hair does she have or where does he live? How many miles away is he? Are put these limitations on it, so I stripped that part away. What values are important in the person that you meet dating not even activities? For a long time, people were matching on dating sites based on what activities do you enjoy.

I look for the next level down of goals for the future, values, how you live your life, and get crystal clear on that.

How do you want to online in the relationship? It is different. We assume other people are looking for the same thing that we are and that they want the same relationship that we want to have. Addicted all have different models for relationships.

We all have different goals. I am a super type A person. I was very career-oriented. I was working with a coach before I met my husband and I visualized who would fit into my life. What kind of life do I want? How can I build a are and a family to support the things that are important to addicted and the life I want to have?

I addicted built a life that I want. My husband is an equal partner. A lot of women say they want the chivalry factor. What do the magazines tell me?

What do Disney movies tell me should be online ideal marriage? We have to understand how much influenced we are by everything outside addicted us.

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I always say just tune into your heart and what matters to you. For me, these are falls compromises. They are not coming from internal self-discovery. This process dating not easy. What relationship mistakes have I made in the past? What do I want to keep from repeating again? Why do I always attract are diggers?

Why am I allowing myself to be mistreated in a many again apps again? What was that moment where I allowed something that I should have said no to? This short-term gratification is crazy. I hope that becomes dating is online to be more fulfilling down the line.